I hope this doesn’t offend anyone, but I think I was meant to be the next Pope. Let’s look at the chain of events.
1) Yesterday I mentioned to someone at work that I thought I’d be a great pope. Within a few minutes, she had made a custom-made Pope hat for me. Miraculously, it fit perfectly.
2) Last night when I left the office, I placed the hat on the floor of my office to go out with the days’ trash.
This morning when I arrived at the office. I found this ‘sign.’ A perfect rainbow on my hand-made Pope hat.
Now, I take signs very seriously. So beginning right now, I’m campaigning for pope. Here are my qualifications:
On the PLUS Side:
1) I’m organized
2) I’m good with people
3) I’m tolerant
4) I’m mostly kind
5) I’m not too sarcastic – although a planner who used to work here would probably disagree
6) I like Italy
7) I know a few words in Latin
8) I played Jesus in ‘Godspell’ – so at least I know the gospel according to St. Matthew
9) In high school, I dated a girl who went to Catholic school
On the DOWN Side:
1) I’m not Catholic
2) I’m married
3) I have children
4) I have absolutely no experience with the Catholic church.
And while those may seem like huge obstacles to overcome, I’m used to doing the impossible. Just last week, a client said the work we create was ‘heavenly.’ I think that’s another sign.
So until I hear otherwise, I think I’m a pretty good candidate. Please comment here, as I’d love to hear your thoughts on my chances of becoming Pope.
Oh, and Happy Ash Wednesday. See – I’m already getting with the program.
R (Soon to be known as Matthew James the First)
3 thoughts on “Rich for Pope”
We just need a little divine intervention to give us our first Jewish Pope.
The rainbow also shows how inclusive you would be as Pope!
I think you would make a great Pope. If you make it can I come visit you in Italy? Plus I can sell your life story to the rag papers. Who knows you better than your much older sister.
From ditch digger to Pope. Who would’ve thought ….